Male entitlement & what it really takes to be a man
Men, I am about to tell you something shocking.
I mean, so shocking, that once you read these words, your mind will be blown.
Your mind will be fucking blown.
Maybe you’ll start questioning things about your own life. Maybe about your own existence.
Hell, maybe even your relationships with others!
I’m going to relate to you an important bit of knowledge that you should already know. It was maybe a lesson that you’ve missed while you were learning the right and wrongs about life; during the time you were still wet behind the ears, as some say, you were still paying attention to other things instead of memorizing the skills you will need to basically function competently in life.
All right, maybe you are still wet behind the ears. Or immature. Or not getting a clue. Who knows.
So enough of the posturing. Are you ready to learn the most shocking thing that you’ll read on this website?
Okay…
Here it goes…
You’re not entitled to pussy.
That’s right. A woman’s vagina is not property; it’s not for your conquest.
Whether she’s a doctor or a sex worker; a barista or a police officer; a co-worker or just a female friend — there’s nothing about her that should insinuate that she is for your own amusement or gratification, and that the agency she possesses to make private decisions that she feels is in her best interest is not yours to disrespect.
You’re not Caesar. A woman is not Gaul.
You’re not Alexander The Great. A woman is not Mesopotamia.
You’re not Genghis Khan. A woman is not central Asia.
Masculinity should not be about aggression and assertion, but rather respect and courtesy. You’d think this would be so fucking obvious than any man would get it, but there’s plenty that don’t. You only have to look at the reaction by some corners of the Internet to Gillette’s The Best Men Can Be campaign. Decried by some as emasculating and anti-men, the campaign (while still an exhibition of consumerism) takes a stand against toxic masculinity, which is centered on entitlement.
I know. It may be shocking that being a man should have nothing to do with entitlement. What you deserve (or don’t deserve) is ultimately subjective; it carries the illusion of objectivity based upon social acceptance.
How many women you slept with doesn’t make you a man. How much sway you hold over a woman doesn’t make you a man. Controlling others doesn’t make you a man. Dominating others doesn’t make you a man.
What does make you a man, though? Respecting others. Recognizing the dignity of other human beings. Acting responsibly. Holding yourself to a degree of accountability.
And being able to accept whatever boundaries that end up being established by the personal decision of a woman.
Novel concept, it isn’t it?
It shouldn’t be.
This should be ingrained in each and every fucking one of you, anyway.
Being rejected does not make you any less of man. Being a virgin doesn’t make you any less of a man. Not having muscles; not having an “exciting” sex life; not having that fancy sports car; not having others to control and boss around doesn’t make you less of a man. Doesn’t. Make You. Less. Of. A. Man.
I’ve been there! I was a virgin until I was 21! I drive a boring mid-size sedan. I have seen who I felt years ago to be the love of my life in the arms of another man!
And guess what?
Never did I sit there and question myself as a man!
Yes. It does suck when you don’t get what you want. Let’s not kid ourselves here. Unrequited love is painful. Unrequited desire is painful. But that pain only becomes as destructive as you allow it to be. You cannot (and should not) control the actions of others; however, you can control how you respond to said actions.
And what’s the most manly response? Not to call her a bitch, slut, cunt, or hoe, but to simply accept the interest is not mutual and move on. Doesn’t matter if you’ve been rejected for a relationship, rejected for casual sex, rejected for paid sex, rejected for physical action, or whatever. None of it matters.
Let’s be real here: if you feel angry over being turned down, then the problem is in the mirror, not her.
She made a decision for herself. Now you need to make a decision for yourself. You’re not entitled to any woman.
But should entitle yourself to living as a constructive, healthy, and as honest of an existence as possible.
Now that’s — in my view — what it takes to be a real man. Courtesy. Respect. Self-Awareness. Responsibility. Not entitlement, conquest, self-aggrandizement, and aggression.
